Life is Tragically Beautiful

31 May

I have little to write today as my heart is heavy and sad… although I should be blogging about my first Ragnar Series and my PR a few weekends back in my half marathon, I want to take a minute and pray.

Pray for those that we have lost and for those that are suffering. Regardless of our affiliation to anyone in particular, we are all human. And because we are human, we feel emotions. Some feel emotions more deeply than others whereas other may appear to be unaffected and cold as stone. Regardless of the category you fall in, if you know me, you know my heart, which means you know I feel things and I feel them deeply. I don’t need to know you well, but if you share with me your story, your experience, your pain, I can’t help but to feel for you. Not out of pity. But because there’s this depth in my heart that feels things for others that I cannot control. I am moved by the generosity of others, by the struggle of others, by the resilience of others, etc. I can’t help but to feel things and to feel things intensely. And perhaps that is why I love to run. Because my highly emotional self (which others view as a flaw) must be contained, subdued, and released…

Therefore I run. I run to feel it out. I run to work it out. I run to cry. I run to laugh. I run to reminisce. I run to recall the pleasures of my past. I marvel in my memories. My memories of love and life and all of its encompassing beauty, both tragic and elated states…

Today I ran for so many reasons. I ran to remember those that I have loved. Those who shine their spirits from above and who’s radiant spirit remains forever engraved in my heart. I also ran for those who I love who are ill because their health is compromised. I ran today for my family members, my friends, for those I have known well and for those I have never met. I ran for our veterans, our service men and women and their spouses, children, and family who gamble with life.

I was reminded today about life. All of life’s mystical beauty – its pain, its joy, its compassion to name a few. I ran today because life, well life is beautiful and yet beautifully tragic and I was shaken by some news that got me thinking.

I reminded myself that God only gives you what you can bear, for you are strong!!! And for those of you who are struggling to accept your current circumstances, I’m so sorry. I don’t know your struggle. I only know mine. But I assure you I can feel your heart and your pain if you choose to share your story. This is why I love being human. I want to maintain my vulnerability because it separates me from so many. I want to feel because I am alive. And because I am alive I can celebrate life’s journey. The beautiful struggle we each endure makes us authentic.

I love you all. I do. Maintain your good heart. Maintain your morals. Stay cognizant of what is right, what is wrong, and live, love, and be in the now.

Celebrate the little moments and the miracles. Everything is a miracle. If you read my blog, you know I am a firm believer in peripheral miracles. When you’re down and out, look around and you’ll see they are all around you, begging you for your undivided attention. Believe in the peripheral miracles. They keep me moving forward.

Smile often. Laugh. Forgive your enemies. Forgive your friends. Forgive the driver that cut you off. And forgive that runner who didn’t wave back at you on the WOD trail ;). Forgive, let go, and move forward.

With forgiveness we find ourselves…we find love, peace, tranquility, and God.

I pray for you.

Please know that time heals and memories don’t fade if you keep replaying them. I know we shouldn’t live in the past, so I ask that you exercise some caution…My only request is you replay the memories that are inviting. Like that of a mother who has an infectious giggle and whose eyes sparkle and radiate life!

With the loss of loved ones our hearts fall heavy to the ground. We hurt because we are selfish. But our memories are memories that are rich of their life!!! How blessed are we to be able to recall them!?

I dedicate this to those that I have loved and lost.

God bless you.

XO

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